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Gifts You Won't Want To Give

  • Sophie
  • 9th December 2016

What's the absolute worst Christmas present you've ever received?

A novelty tie? A pair of gloves that were quite obviously a last minute purchase from the petrol station? Some suspect-looking chocolate liqueurs, perhaps?!

Now, we don't wish to sound ungrateful or anything - and obviously Christmas is all about the giving, not the receiving - but sometimes the gifts lovingly presented to us by our friends and family are€¦well€¦disappointing, at best - and downright disturbing, at worst!

As the Christmas shopping season rears its Santa-hat-adorned-head once again, we thought it would be fun to step back from all the madness and appreciate just how wrong people can sometimes get it. Let's take a look back at the Christmas of yesteryear to see some of the worst offenders€¦

Desktop Drum Kit

As if it wasn't bad enough that you have to sit your desk all day at work, imagine if your co-worker rocked up after the festive break with their very own drum kit to keep on their desk? We can't quite work out when or why this would be useful thing to have, and we're pretty sure it was designed purely to get on other people's nerves.

Mewgaroo pet pouch hoodie

Yes, you read that right, Mewgaroo€¦as in, miaow/kangaroo€¦do you get it? This simple (yet still somehow unbelievable) design lets you sit on the sofa with your cat snuggled up in the hoodie's fleece-lined pouch, like a feline kangaroo. No more worrying about disturbing your cat if you need to go make a cup of tea - or if you ever want to have a social life again!*

*We're fully aware that some of you cat-lovers out there (you know who you are) will actually think this is the best gift ever.

Beard baubles

Once again, yep, you read that correctly. A strange new craze emerged last year, where bearded chaps throughout the country decided it was a good idea to festoon their beards with tiny, multicoloured, shimmering baubles. And for those who didn't? They probably received one as their Secret Santa gift - which got accidentally 'misplaced' afterwards.

Wireless eye massager

Just when we thought we didn't have enough gadgets and gizmos, along came the wireless eye massager (because a wired eye massager would just be silly, right?) This frankly terrifying invention massages "your entire ocular region and features pre-recorded "soothing nature sounds. What ever happened to good old-fashioned sleep and fresh air?

This Christmas, don't even think about getting anything from this list! If you're looking for that perfect present and don't want to risk getting it wrong, why not give the gift of adventure with a Go Ape voucher?


They can use their voucher for a day in the trees they'll never forget. Even better, for a limited time only we're giving away an awesome virtual reality headset (and accompanying app) with every gift voucher purchase - so they can relive the Go Ape experience again and again!

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